Just when I don't know where to throw up my thoughts, this blog becomes the one that can tolerate them.
I'm trying to adapt to the life of being a university student. It's pretty harsh and serious. A lot more serious than high school phase, when the assignments don't use regulated references such as vancouver and had no specific formats in space, fonts, and whatever, when exams are guaranteed for you to pass, and most importantly, when the teacher explains every single detail you need to know in the materials. Academics in university life is highly broad, especially medicine. The lecturer (not called as the teacher anymore, and I'm about to mention why) does not provide the full knowledge. In other words, as a university student, I have to dig in myself.
Social life is dramatically different as well. I'm not sure if it is because I have never really dealt with pure Indonesian colleagues before or background diversity, or if it's because the age factor. Well, apparently, college students are adult learners, so I'm basically dealing with adults too, and to tell you the truth, most of them are surprisingly... how do you say it? Mature? Cooked? With all the sense of leadership, highly structured thoughts and charismatic talent. I feel like I'm in a different zone, that is not meant for people like me, who obviously has no leadership qualification and stutters when is told to deliver a public speech. I have an exceedingly low quality of soft skill. There's so much to learn from these people.
Apparently, university phase is where I'm pushed to develop the soft skills I'm lacking, through student unions and organizations, as well as events conducted by students. Well, I think this particular part in the university is the most appealing one to me. Since, during my high school period, I was rarely involved with those type of activities. Well, there were activities of those kinds but... not as intense, as frequent and as structured as it is in the university.
Other than those, there are other colleagues who seem to shockingly develop shallower thoughts than mine. People who judge others by appearance, background, and who they're dating with. Some others are plainly opportunists who take friendships for granted to selfishly gain a qualified academic performance without much effort. Some also who act incredibly spoiled and let other team mates do the work without offering any assistance. And the rest just don't have any opinions upon anything. I mean, come on! As a university student, don't you want to get rid of the past attributes of being dependent to others? Don't you have a sense of a slight liberty of expressing your criticism? Do you directly agree and choose to memorize it all blindly just to get an A on your test? Because honestly, I do think that grades still matter of course, but I care more towards whether if I'm still able to grasp and store the things I've been studying and save it for my professional years of being a doctor. There's no time to judge people if you think about those stuff.
It's hard to build a trusted friendship in university. Everyone seem to act as opportunists. I know this thought is not right and when I'm aware of it, I immediately banish it. But eventually, I regret doing so. Because after they've reached their targeted benefits, they leave you just like that. You can't reject assistance, that would be rude. But you can't also be too naive. So, I end up befriending everyone in my batch. I do have a group of people who I hang out with frequently, but they're not really the type of people I expect to personally open up with. Typically, they're the ones who open up and I just act as a good listener. I don't really mind this, in fact, I'm comfortable with this role I'm playing. My personal life is totally segregated.
I totally haven't gotten the hang of university lifestyle yet, since I still act like a high school student (and obviously still look like one). Adaptation is a process. I'm not halfway there yet, but I'm enjoying the process.
I do know, though, that the most crucial point of surviving college life is to maintain a good eating habit.