7.28.2016

Trying to Make Sense of Things

The world is small, someone once claimed.

At this moment, I completely disagree with that statement. There are multiple incidents happening in this world we're living. There are bombs dropped in cities, there are families with children floating on the mediterranean sea, there are people dying from starvation, and other heartbreaking stories. 

Stories?

Yes, they seem to sound like stories to me. For I just cannot put my finger on why these stories don't feel real when the world is small? People around me seem to be okay. There are people spending money to get themselves drunk and high to feel entertained. There are others entirely absorbed with their own personal love affairs, and regard them as the most problematic event happening in this small world. I, for one, may be included in the latter category.

But just imagine, in a small world, people are feeling pain and insecurity, but some of them have to feel that while their lives are at risk. How frivolous my own problem is! The moment when our ears hear the blast of explosions and the children's screams, how will I ever feel concerned about my problems? I can't pinpoint exactly whether those stories are factual and I'm just a blissfully ignorant young woman, or are they just stories exaggerated by the media? I'm having endless questions in my head right now, because it's probably more likely that I've been ignorant. 

I feel a pang of guilt when any close friend of mine tells me about their problem, and I instead think that 'you have no idea how your obstacle is negligible compared to what the other side of the world is facing right now'. There are two reasons why I'm overwhelmed with guilt: 

1) They are my friends, and they have the right to expect and receive support and encouragement.
2) I, myself, would be in need of support if i were in their place.

Yes, you see, Karina, people do not have to go through life-threatening events, to have someone feel concerned about their matters. As a famous saying goes, 'everyone is facing a different battle'.

Indeed, it is a small world. An era of globalization. It seems very easy for someone to pack their high-end camera and get a footage from a deserted part of the globe. But when everything is behind the screen, it feels like everything can be fabricated. After all, we are living in a small world full of conspiracies too. People with power, who intend to stay powerful as long as they can, construct these conspiracies to increase power. On the other hand, some others do not desire power, not because they are pure at heart, but because they are too coward to face challenges of having power. Power is good, you see. Power, in fact, can terminate these horrid scenes.

But that's the thing. I'm powerless. And I live in societies that seem oblivious to the problems of this small world we're living in. And it feels so useless, this being of mine.

I feel incredibly pathetic whenever an issue of love gets me so agitated. It feels selfish to not have this same intensity of agitation towards what is happening to humanity today. It feels overly wrong in every way.





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